I tell you what though; I didn't half get a fright when I saw the headline "Russian has love for Albion". For a minute, Inside Left's mind went a-racin' at the prospect of a Russian billionaire spending his life savings bringing the cream of European talent to Scotland. Imagine the likes of Drogba, Torres, and Ronaldo turning out on a Wednesday night at the completely rebuilt Forthbank Stadium as they crush Brechin 8-0 in front of a capacity 3,000 crowd. Just imagine that eh? If you build it, they will come, was the mantra. Well, I stopped mantra-ing soon after I read on and realised that the Albion in question was West Bromwich, and not Stirling Albion. Still, if you don’t have dreams, you have nightmares. Just ask Cowdenbeath's Brian Welsh.
Yes, he's been sacked after he led the club back to the Third Division. Cowdenbeath had a rotten season, finishing second bottom of the league but with more than twice the points that basement boys (and Englandshire based) Berwick had. The club have wished the former Dundee United and Hibernian player "all the best in his career going forward". Strange thing really, wishing a defender well going forward. That's probably the last thing you want your defenders to do, otherwise you lose goals and get relegated. New manager Danny Lennon is said to be "exited" and is also looking to take the club "forward". Funny how managers always say they'll take a club forward. It's sort of a given right, going forward? How many managers would take their club backwards? Or left a bit? Lennon does add the word "hopefully" to his ambitions for the future, so don’t be too disappointed for the Blue Brazil if next year they're still in the third.
Ross County are hoping to raise some money to buy new floodlights for next season if the club wants to take part in SFL and SFA competitions. Chairman Roy McGregor (only in the Highlands would you get a name like that) is asking the supporters to chip in £50 towards the £90,000 needed for a new set of halogens. Since the whole Gretna thing, clubs the length and breadth of the country are shaking in their moccasins at the fear of not meeting the SFL's strict standards (whatever they are). Gretna failed to meet the SFA club license restrictions, and look what happened to them, right? The club is resigned to replacing the lights at enormous expense, but Inside Left has spotted a potential way out. In an interesting twist of fate (or conflict, we're not sure), Ross County's sponsors for next year are McLean Electrical, who, according to their website, are purveyors of "Roadway & External Lighting Systems, High Masts, Towers, Road Signs and Accessories". Surely something could be done there?
On a side note, do you not think that Gretna is fast becoming the bogeyman of Scottish Football? Every time there's so much as a hint of trouble (the shop's run out of Tunnocks Tea Cakes, the ladder used to get the stray balls from off the roof of the main stand is missing, that sort of thing) you've got newspapers comparing the plight of the club in question with that of Gretna. Frightened chairman everywhere going "Doris, fit ye mean, thirs nae teacakes left? Did ah no buy anither box last week? For fuck sake, keep yer mooth shut aboot it ya crabbit auld hoor, do ya no mind fit happened tae Gretna?"
Where was I? Oh yes. Aberdeen. Dons boss Jimmy Calderwood is still keen to keep Alan Maybury on for next season. The Irish international has a preference for playing in Englandshire, but should no one show interest, he'd love to stay. That's commitment for you. And Dundee United gaffer Craig Levein has denied any interest in out-of-contract and out-of-work midfielder Barry Nicholson. Nicholson turned down the offer of a new contract with the Dons and with Preston North End still not exactly jumping over hoops to sign the 29-year old things are looking bleak. Sheffield Wednesday also expressed interest but with no offers forthcoming, Nicholson is currently keeping in shape by jogging to the dole office in St Nicholas Street, doing squat thrusts while waiting in the queue for his giro.
Some transfer news then. Michael Bolochoweckyj has signed for East Stirlingshire after being released by Berwick Rangers. The 24-year old has had spells at Ross County (did he bring his torch with him, I wonder?) and Alloa. It's hoped that David Nicholls will put pen to paper on a permanent deal. Alan Gourlay has signed one-year deal at Dumbarton from Vale of Leven Juniors. According to Gilbert Lawrie, chairman of the Sons, "he's an entertainer and, being a local boy, should generate some interest". A shrewd move then - if Gourlay turns out to be a complete shiter, he can always entertain the pensioners at the karaoke on the Tuesday night.
Lastly, with one day to go before applications are due in, Edinburgh City have said they're one of the clubs hoping to join the Third Division. They join Spartans, Preston Athletic, Annan Athletic and Cove Rangers in the hat, along with Huntly, who, as Inside Left predicted earlier this week, also sent off "application.doc" to the SFL.
And contrary to earlier reports, Third Lanark will not be adding their ball into the hat. This caused much disappointment here at Inside Left, because we are football romantics at heart and would like nothing better than to hear the illustrious name of Third Lanark being called out by stuffy BBC home-county types every Saturday at quarter to six. However, we live in fear of a repeat of the whole Gretna thing.
Mind fit happened tae them?
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