Mince & Tatties: Third Lanark to make comeback?

It was turning into another quiet afternoon at Inside Left Hall. We were just sitting out on the West Lawn, enjoying a simply delightful chilled McEwans Export 2008 and partaking in some pleasant social intercourse with the staff, reminiscing about seasons past and speculating about the season to come here in dear auld Alba, when suddenly the peace and quiet was rudely interrupted by news that one of the giants of Scottish football might be making a return to the playing fields of the Scottish Football League.

Far be it for us to suggest that our words, no more than meaningless scribbles, have a touch of prophecy about them, but it was only yesterday, while talking about another colossus of the game from days gone by that we mentioned a team, however obliquely, who are now considering applying to join the league. We're talking about the Third Lanarkshire Rifle Volunteers, perhaps known better to you all as Third Lanark.

Third Lanark have an almost holy mystique about them. Despite not winning all that much in the 95 years they existed (their last major win being in 1935), they are generally mentioned in the same sentence as other famous - and sadly defunct - clubs of that era such as Renton and Vale of Leven (part of a Dunbartonshire trio of clubs along with subject of yesterdays Who Are Ya?, Dumbarton, who where instrumental in founding the sport in Scotland). Third Lanark remained a well-supported club right up until the day the Board of Trade declared the club bankrupt and closed them down, shortly after their last game against Dumbarton. Theories as to reason of the swift demise are plentiful, but most point to greedy chairmen and the profits to be made from the sale of their ground, Cathkin Park.  The current incarnation of Third Lanark Athletic Club, the one seeking admission to League (officials from the club met with the SFL yesterday) was established in 2003 and won the Scottish Amateur Football League and now play in the Greater Glasgow Adult League. 

It's a Scottish football romantic's wet dream to see the name 'Third Lanark' appearing in the fixture lists and league tables, but the chance of their application being successful is slim. For one, they still play at what is left of Cathkin Park, a ground so dilapidated that an enormous amount would have to be spent to bring it up to even the minimum of standards required by the SFL. Secondly, does (Greater) Glasgow really need another football team in the league? With the other sides in and around Glasgow finding it hard to compete with Rangers and Celtic for money, glamour and attendances, would Third Lanark be able to pull in enough spectators every week to keep the books balanced, avoiding the sort of financial troubles that brought down the club whose place they're trying to take? We shall see. While Inside Left is a keen supporter of grass-roots football, we still have our money on Spartans. And Cove. And Annan Athletic. In fact, we have money on all the other teams. You see, we like to hedge our bets here - all this McEwans does not come cheap!

Till tomorrow!